Saturday, February 28, 2009
Shine on
i guess i haven't done this for a while... well, i was saving this for a few weeks ago but guess didn't need it then. now's pretty good too
cheers to the spirits and everyone around;
tomorrow will come, and i'd do what's right
cheers to the spirits and everyone around;
tomorrow will come, and i'd do what's right
Thursday, February 26, 2009
Of "A"s and "B"s
well, i am online quite a lot and recently something i've read provoked my thoughts so much i just had to voice my opinions to the world world out there (though who actually still reads this i don't know). so, yeah. here it is
i guess, perhaps deep down, i'm actually pretty closed minded and have a conservative mindset... i have pretty strong opinions on certain issues (though they probably are usuallly rather weird and out of the norm ones) and am quite biased on them and all... however, that normally doesn't spill through when dealing with other people (i hope?)... i've always advocated and practised keeping an open mind regarding what other people do. at least most of the time. i might frown on certain actions and intentions and totally detest them but i try my utmost to respect their decisions. after all, they probably went through their own decision-making process and all and weighed up all the actions themselves. i might not agree with them, but they probably did what they felt was right at that time. who am i to judge them anyway (i might complain a lot and all, but that's another issue). i tend to keep my lofty ideals and high expectations and standards for myself. for others, even when i can't bring myself to agree, i'd at least give some benefit of doubt.
but recently, i can't help but find myself bugged by some things i've seen/read/etc... not bugged as in irritated by it terribly and constantly thinking of it, never having any peace. more of bugged as in, can't help but find myself passing severe judgement on sth and actually enough to be a little emotionally involved in it (emotionally involved sounds like a real serious thing. but it's much more minor. can't find any better words haha. more on emotionally involved later)
granted, i'm very biased on this issue here i must admit. and no, as much as i have felt over it i'm still not acting/haven't acted on it. that just isn't my style. but i must admit harbouring hopes of failure and doom as well as feeling a sense of vindication/joy when things don't go well (that's the emotionally involved part, so yeah). ok. it's evil, yes i know. and from time to time feeling bad for hoping for such things creeps in. but well, i'm not gonna suppress my ill feelings just because they are morally wrong
i think/hope i see both sides of the picture more than the average person. our side of the story is always gonna be one sided. while we are complaining/frowning upon the actions of certain people and bitching bout them with our friends and all, i'm sure on the other side he will be sharing with his friends too what is happening and his side of the story. unless the one we are talking bout is some emotionally hardened creature who no longer has any 'semblance of a moral compass or someone who is really so terrible he doesn't have any friends to confide their side of the story to (both cases in which we should actually pity the guy, as bad the things as he have done), one usually has a reason for doing something.
but well, i've had a few realisations recently. well, i've been reading "Fooled by Randomness" the past few weeks. it's an interesting read for people interested in economics or just some basic intellectual pursuit with many interesting ideas, but a phrase simply just formed in my head while reading it, regarding certain issues happening around me and the book in general too. "Just because you admit your flaws and confess to being a bastard doesn't give you any right to be a bastard"
crude, but i think gets the point across. well, as a reply to what i've read, sth stemming from that idea, "Just because you have your reasons and thought you were doing the right thing doesn't mean you can be a bastard". Sometimes, you know, when friends complain bout certain characteristics of a person, a common defense for them is "that's just the way he is". but after a while, i've kind of realised/felt that just because that's his usual self doesn't give him any defense for being a total idiot.
but at least for the idiots who just go through their lives being the idiots they are, i still see some saving grace. they affect everyone along the way and all, but well, if they are oblivious to their effects and all and they end up leading happy lives themselves, at least they've won in the game of life. they may be bastards, but at least they come out winners i guess. not the way i'd win my game, but well, if that's their game i'm not gonna do anything much
much more unforgiveable are what i term the "inquisitive bastards". not only do they ravage everyone with their "god, what the hell was he thinking" acts and all, he wraps himself with all sorts of fantasy in his own sugar-coated "reality". suddenly, it seems like he's the victim. oh, such a poor thing with traumatic experiences. oh, how he was just trying his best to make his way out of the situation. all bullshit i say. i wonder if they ever tried reading what they write. or try to think objectively (i know it's impossible to be entirely objective but at least try you know) and reflect on what they are doing.
as much as i would love to i'm not interferring and entering the game to create some havoc. that's not my style. hmm, well, i guess my way is just as evil. but if just for today, let me play devil's advocate. i'd be back to being nice tml (or on another issue)
let fate deal my hand.
best of luck to you. cos you're definitely not getting any...
i guess, perhaps deep down, i'm actually pretty closed minded and have a conservative mindset... i have pretty strong opinions on certain issues (though they probably are usuallly rather weird and out of the norm ones) and am quite biased on them and all... however, that normally doesn't spill through when dealing with other people (i hope?)... i've always advocated and practised keeping an open mind regarding what other people do. at least most of the time. i might frown on certain actions and intentions and totally detest them but i try my utmost to respect their decisions. after all, they probably went through their own decision-making process and all and weighed up all the actions themselves. i might not agree with them, but they probably did what they felt was right at that time. who am i to judge them anyway (i might complain a lot and all, but that's another issue). i tend to keep my lofty ideals and high expectations and standards for myself. for others, even when i can't bring myself to agree, i'd at least give some benefit of doubt.
but recently, i can't help but find myself bugged by some things i've seen/read/etc... not bugged as in irritated by it terribly and constantly thinking of it, never having any peace. more of bugged as in, can't help but find myself passing severe judgement on sth and actually enough to be a little emotionally involved in it (emotionally involved sounds like a real serious thing. but it's much more minor. can't find any better words haha. more on emotionally involved later)
granted, i'm very biased on this issue here i must admit. and no, as much as i have felt over it i'm still not acting/haven't acted on it. that just isn't my style. but i must admit harbouring hopes of failure and doom as well as feeling a sense of vindication/joy when things don't go well (that's the emotionally involved part, so yeah). ok. it's evil, yes i know. and from time to time feeling bad for hoping for such things creeps in. but well, i'm not gonna suppress my ill feelings just because they are morally wrong
i think/hope i see both sides of the picture more than the average person. our side of the story is always gonna be one sided. while we are complaining/frowning upon the actions of certain people and bitching bout them with our friends and all, i'm sure on the other side he will be sharing with his friends too what is happening and his side of the story. unless the one we are talking bout is some emotionally hardened creature who no longer has any 'semblance of a moral compass or someone who is really so terrible he doesn't have any friends to confide their side of the story to (both cases in which we should actually pity the guy, as bad the things as he have done), one usually has a reason for doing something.
but well, i've had a few realisations recently. well, i've been reading "Fooled by Randomness" the past few weeks. it's an interesting read for people interested in economics or just some basic intellectual pursuit with many interesting ideas, but a phrase simply just formed in my head while reading it, regarding certain issues happening around me and the book in general too. "Just because you admit your flaws and confess to being a bastard doesn't give you any right to be a bastard"
crude, but i think gets the point across. well, as a reply to what i've read, sth stemming from that idea, "Just because you have your reasons and thought you were doing the right thing doesn't mean you can be a bastard". Sometimes, you know, when friends complain bout certain characteristics of a person, a common defense for them is "that's just the way he is". but after a while, i've kind of realised/felt that just because that's his usual self doesn't give him any defense for being a total idiot.
but at least for the idiots who just go through their lives being the idiots they are, i still see some saving grace. they affect everyone along the way and all, but well, if they are oblivious to their effects and all and they end up leading happy lives themselves, at least they've won in the game of life. they may be bastards, but at least they come out winners i guess. not the way i'd win my game, but well, if that's their game i'm not gonna do anything much
much more unforgiveable are what i term the "inquisitive bastards". not only do they ravage everyone with their "god, what the hell was he thinking" acts and all, he wraps himself with all sorts of fantasy in his own sugar-coated "reality". suddenly, it seems like he's the victim. oh, such a poor thing with traumatic experiences. oh, how he was just trying his best to make his way out of the situation. all bullshit i say. i wonder if they ever tried reading what they write. or try to think objectively (i know it's impossible to be entirely objective but at least try you know) and reflect on what they are doing.
as much as i would love to i'm not interferring and entering the game to create some havoc. that's not my style. hmm, well, i guess my way is just as evil. but if just for today, let me play devil's advocate. i'd be back to being nice tml (or on another issue)
let fate deal my hand.
best of luck to you. cos you're definitely not getting any...
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Turn down the lights
Ever had one of those moments where you are staring defeat in your face? things aren't over yet, and of course we all still hope that it will turn out well after all, but deep down, you are kind of resigned to the fact that things probably aren't gonna go your way...
and i guess supporting arsenal and the pacers aren't helping me on that... score tied 0-0, 2nd minute into injury time... 4 points behind with 20 seconds left...
hmm... but as always, we still cling on to that last bit of hope
and i guess supporting arsenal and the pacers aren't helping me on that... score tied 0-0, 2nd minute into injury time... 4 points behind with 20 seconds left...
hmm... but as always, we still cling on to that last bit of hope
Sunday, February 15, 2009
The return of the doodles
i don't think too many people know of this. but doodling is one of my fave things to do. though haven't done it much since school ended, what with no more lecture notes to destroy... and usually it's just random crap and nowhere near aesthetically pleasing... well, so, yeah. usually it's on paper... though once in a while i do doodle on msn convos too. and even rarer sometimes i get inspiration and decide to just randomly doodle on paint/photoshop/gimp... today's one of them haha
ok. they are a bit crap. but all doodles are... i've tried not to use anything other than fill and brush though to retain the feel of good ol' simple doodling rather than a full scale artwork thingy. then again, even if i did try hard no one will ever see my artistic ventures as a full scale artwork. but i guess i'm reasonably pleased with it. think can convey what i want it to
only other time i recall where i had a similar "successful" doodle on my comp is like quite long ago, a few years back... think i posted it on the blog then too... that is definitely a nicer atttempt aesthetically i feel... let me go fish it out...
ok. i give up. can't find it.. i'd post it up later if i do... but that probably means it will never see the face of the earth... til next time then
EDIT: found it haha... everything else kinda sucks, but i love my dog here haha... first time i ever tried to draw sth backview, and somehow it worked... enjoy...
ok. they are a bit crap. but all doodles are... i've tried not to use anything other than fill and brush though to retain the feel of good ol' simple doodling rather than a full scale artwork thingy. then again, even if i did try hard no one will ever see my artistic ventures as a full scale artwork. but i guess i'm reasonably pleased with it. think can convey what i want it to
only other time i recall where i had a similar "successful" doodle on my comp is like quite long ago, a few years back... think i posted it on the blog then too... that is definitely a nicer atttempt aesthetically i feel... let me go fish it out...
ok. i give up. can't find it.. i'd post it up later if i do... but that probably means it will never see the face of the earth... til next time then
EDIT: found it haha... everything else kinda sucks, but i love my dog here haha... first time i ever tried to draw sth backview, and somehow it worked... enjoy...
Thursday, February 12, 2009
Dancing Matt
hmm, there's many links to the topic i wanna talk bout... dunno where to start... ok, first link... so, yeah. as last post shows, i was quite hooked on sesame street and stuff past few days. so had the elmo thing on fb. after which emily and ash reminded me of viral videos (bananaphone and the badger song, which reminded me of the llama song and the elements song)... but ok, i'd leave it hanging here for a while...
second link... recently caught benjamin button... before the movie starts, commercial as usual.. i always look forward to seeing one of them in the theatres haha. and was quite psychic that day. just commented to bel that i wanted to see the visa commercial and it came on. talked bout it and how it is prob my fave commercial of the year, if not all time, when she enlightened me that the guy actually was already doing the dancing thing before visa came along...
so yeah, these two points link me to Dancing Matt (), something i've been TOTALLY hooked on the past two days or so. somehow i was not one of the 10million people who caught the viral video that started as early as 3 years ago... but oh well, better late than never
i must say i totally love it! it's just so infectious! and i'm sad to admit, but the SNAG in me is like made me so emotional the first time i caught the most recent one (dancing 2008) with all the music and people joining in and stuff...
ok. so have been doing loads of things related to it. reading his blog backlog. changing my ringtone to the visa ringtone (available on visa travel happy's own website to my pleasant surprise) (i'd prob change to the dancing 2008 song if i can find it...) doing the stupid dance along with the video away from the sight of everyone else in the comfort of my home... trawling through the host of youtube videos regarding matt
one video in particular had me in stitches!
ok. the first link is the one that kept me laughing out real loud for a few minutes. i kinda viewed it in the wrong order, cos the first link occured later and was like an explanation to the second link... well, ur choice on which u want to view first (if anyone's still with me here)...
ok. that's all for today... hmm.. abrupt ending, but oh well...
There's a sucker born every minute;
and i guess i saved 244 babies my minute...
second link... recently caught benjamin button... before the movie starts, commercial as usual.. i always look forward to seeing one of them in the theatres haha. and was quite psychic that day. just commented to bel that i wanted to see the visa commercial and it came on. talked bout it and how it is prob my fave commercial of the year, if not all time, when she enlightened me that the guy actually was already doing the dancing thing before visa came along...
so yeah, these two points link me to Dancing Matt (), something i've been TOTALLY hooked on the past two days or so. somehow i was not one of the 10million people who caught the viral video that started as early as 3 years ago... but oh well, better late than never
i must say i totally love it! it's just so infectious! and i'm sad to admit, but the SNAG in me is like made me so emotional the first time i caught the most recent one (dancing 2008) with all the music and people joining in and stuff...
ok. so have been doing loads of things related to it. reading his blog backlog. changing my ringtone to the visa ringtone (available on visa travel happy's own website to my pleasant surprise) (i'd prob change to the dancing 2008 song if i can find it...) doing the stupid dance along with the video away from the sight of everyone else in the comfort of my home... trawling through the host of youtube videos regarding matt
one video in particular had me in stitches!
ok. the first link is the one that kept me laughing out real loud for a few minutes. i kinda viewed it in the wrong order, cos the first link occured later and was like an explanation to the second link... well, ur choice on which u want to view first (if anyone's still with me here)...
ok. that's all for today... hmm.. abrupt ending, but oh well...
There's a sucker born every minute;
and i guess i saved 244 babies my minute...
Monday, February 09, 2009
Don't know why...
Somehow a series of events led me to look at tons of sesame street clips on youtube. and the thing is i didn't even really watched sesame street when i was young. always wanted to like it, but i must admit i seldom got to catch it, and even when i did it didn't rank among my favourite shows compared to cartoons like, say ninja turtles and others.
but my, i'm loving it now lol. since when was elmo so cute... well, if you're free and bored u might wanna check out these clips
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AxW6-_Qx1JA
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=skNGWQkQorQ
anothing caught my eye
ok. this is just to link two things together, but yeah. if u liked the song do check out the real version heh. ok. i'm off
but my, i'm loving it now lol. since when was elmo so cute... well, if you're free and bored u might wanna check out these clips
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AxW6-_Qx1JA
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=skNGWQkQorQ
anothing caught my eye
ok. this is just to link two things together, but yeah. if u liked the song do check out the real version heh. ok. i'm off
Wednesday, February 04, 2009
The girl who cried wolf
nothing much in terms of events happened the past couple of days. so, yeah. nothing much to blog bout. but i just felt like poppin by
yeah, meeting up with sunny, jason, bel and gen was fun. dinner was cool. i've always liked the snacks and stuff at taka basement (ok, used to like them more, but still like)... like will always make it a point to grab sth there if i was in the area. but first time had a full meal all made up of just them... we had 3-4 rounds heh. but darn, forgot bout my brownies and cream puffs. but oh well, hagen daz was nice. cool to just hang around and do nothing much in particular. i love my life heh
oh yeah, and then visited smu a few days back too. ash got his matriculation card. got a tour there before during syc 06 so nothing much new (the citylink-esque underground passage was still cool, but everything else is still the same bit underwhelming)... yeah, had to talk my way past security guards again saying i forgot to bring the pass and all. i haevn't had good run-ins with security guards recently haha. oh well
so, dinner and all after that. usual stuff, which is nice as always. got tricked by him for second time in a week. darn it. i must learn to call out bluffs. i guess i tend to err on the side of caution too much. must just whack when not sure next time. i guess i'm never good with these stuff. especially in poker too... it'd be like i'm sure the guy is bluffing, so i go along with him. but after the whole affair i realised i don't have a good hand either. the opponent might be bluffing, but i'm leaving everything down to the kicker also. learnt to slowly just fold in these situations to take the safe route.
i wonder if i need a rethink
and it's when you know you've fell for it once you aren't sure of yourself anymore
yeah, meeting up with sunny, jason, bel and gen was fun. dinner was cool. i've always liked the snacks and stuff at taka basement (ok, used to like them more, but still like)... like will always make it a point to grab sth there if i was in the area. but first time had a full meal all made up of just them... we had 3-4 rounds heh. but darn, forgot bout my brownies and cream puffs. but oh well, hagen daz was nice. cool to just hang around and do nothing much in particular. i love my life heh
oh yeah, and then visited smu a few days back too. ash got his matriculation card. got a tour there before during syc 06 so nothing much new (the citylink-esque underground passage was still cool, but everything else is still the same bit underwhelming)... yeah, had to talk my way past security guards again saying i forgot to bring the pass and all. i haevn't had good run-ins with security guards recently haha. oh well
so, dinner and all after that. usual stuff, which is nice as always. got tricked by him for second time in a week. darn it. i must learn to call out bluffs. i guess i tend to err on the side of caution too much. must just whack when not sure next time. i guess i'm never good with these stuff. especially in poker too... it'd be like i'm sure the guy is bluffing, so i go along with him. but after the whole affair i realised i don't have a good hand either. the opponent might be bluffing, but i'm leaving everything down to the kicker also. learnt to slowly just fold in these situations to take the safe route.
i wonder if i need a rethink
and it's when you know you've fell for it once you aren't sure of yourself anymore
