Thursday, January 15, 2009
First musings of 09
it's funny how it's 2 digits into jan already... just a li'l less than a month back i was starting to blog again and everything. and had plans to do resolutions/things to look forward to in 09 when i fell sick then everything went way off... the list became more like "food i wanna eat" so i scrapped it. retried the list thing recently but i've like started to clear and tick off some of them already so decided to forget it...
i guess quite a lot has happened since last i was here... good or bad i don't know.. but interesting definitely... slowly everyone's been getting on with their lives and all... some back to sch, some found work, some back in army and everything... suddenly it's like i'm the only one left (ok, there's ash the other slacker too) with nothing going on and nothing on the horizon even.. but i'm fine with that. retirement life is totally for me and i'm one of the few people who can totally slack and while a day away. but it's kinda weird also. how it's like my timeline totally defer from others. like how my time seems to pass slower and i can notice more things than others (lol. kinda like those drama shows where some deity comes to the mortal world and watch while the humans age)
but past few days have been interesting to say the least. but oh well... i'm not really into the note down what i've done mood. but today went out with an old friend... an incident make me think of a lot of stuff.. ok, i was thinking of quite a lot already before i met him. kinda uncanny how some of the stuff i was thinking bout came up to be things i'd reflect on later
so, yeah. new year resolutions. i haven't specially made them since bout four or five years ago, being more of the just plan as things go type so i know i'd not keep them.. but i guess i can say the motto of the past two of three years can be regarded as my new year resolution for those years. and i'm continuing with it. "Enjoy the simple things in life. Smell the roses along the way". The simpler life indeed...
i reiterate what i've always said a lot over here. i may always complain and moan bout a lot of stuff but deep down i'm actually contented and satisfied with a lot of things that has happened in my life. i've been quite blessed my whole life and lady luck has generally been with me and i've come out good in most crucial situations so i know i'm happy. i hope this can continue and i'd learn to appreciate more of the small but significant things i haven't learnt to yet
and after my musing on the train and everything i'd add one more for 09. continue building on my faith in myself, my friends, and everything i stand for... regulars of this place will know religion and my lack of it is one topic i've always loved to touch on but usually just brush through cos it's way freaking hard to write bout it while still being sensitive and insightful. i don't think i am anywhere near that now anyway also (i might try a full entry on that one of these days but don't bank on it)
but yeah... to feel others in. i've always admired the power religions have been able to harness and bring about. it's absolutely phenomenal. but sadly, i don't really agree and subscribe to most of their views. so as a non-believer, i've always wondered and mused bout how we too can harness such incredible energy... it's nice to blindly believe in something. it's amazing how much strength people have been able to draw from religion, be it when they are down in their deepest trenches or just ordinary people going bout their everyday lives.
what i will do when everything around me falls apart is one question i ask myself occasionaly. when u find out that everything u have done has failed, and everything else has failed you, who will you turn to? i put myself in other people's shoes and i can see that religion can indeed be a powerful thing to hang on to for many people. having a great grandfather with a spiritual experience during WWII probably reinforced that for me
but no, i'm a deep non-believer. i'm starting to call myself a secular humanist rather than a free thinker even. it all started early in secondary school when i found that term. started out as a joke cos it sounded cool. tried it on one evangelist once. could see him all stumped when the last few times when i got approached by them i could so totally swear i saw their eyes light up when i say i'm a free thinker
ok. but read a bit more bout it recently (recently as in past few years)... it's a very disjointed group with a lot of differing views, and while there are some things i don't agree with i can totally identify myself with many parts and the main gist of it. basically, how i feel bout humanism is the belief in the human spirit: the ability and strength of us to overcome obstacles. of course, there's the evolution stuff too but belief is what i like to talk more about
and at the center of it all is belief in yourself. i'd like to think i've gone a long way since last time. can still quite vividly remember the teenage angst (i like to call it that haha) i went through from bout p5 to sec 2-3 approx... um. ok. i lazy to elaborate. when i look back i find myself way different from back then. it's like...
(ok i'm exhausted. this is supposed to link to some musing and reflections on ambition and drive. which was supposed to be the main point of today. but i'd leave this hanging on like this. hopefully will come back tml. but no guarantees. til then...)
i guess quite a lot has happened since last i was here... good or bad i don't know.. but interesting definitely... slowly everyone's been getting on with their lives and all... some back to sch, some found work, some back in army and everything... suddenly it's like i'm the only one left (ok, there's ash the other slacker too) with nothing going on and nothing on the horizon even.. but i'm fine with that. retirement life is totally for me and i'm one of the few people who can totally slack and while a day away. but it's kinda weird also. how it's like my timeline totally defer from others. like how my time seems to pass slower and i can notice more things than others (lol. kinda like those drama shows where some deity comes to the mortal world and watch while the humans age)
but past few days have been interesting to say the least. but oh well... i'm not really into the note down what i've done mood. but today went out with an old friend... an incident make me think of a lot of stuff.. ok, i was thinking of quite a lot already before i met him. kinda uncanny how some of the stuff i was thinking bout came up to be things i'd reflect on later
so, yeah. new year resolutions. i haven't specially made them since bout four or five years ago, being more of the just plan as things go type so i know i'd not keep them.. but i guess i can say the motto of the past two of three years can be regarded as my new year resolution for those years. and i'm continuing with it. "Enjoy the simple things in life. Smell the roses along the way". The simpler life indeed...
i reiterate what i've always said a lot over here. i may always complain and moan bout a lot of stuff but deep down i'm actually contented and satisfied with a lot of things that has happened in my life. i've been quite blessed my whole life and lady luck has generally been with me and i've come out good in most crucial situations so i know i'm happy. i hope this can continue and i'd learn to appreciate more of the small but significant things i haven't learnt to yet
and after my musing on the train and everything i'd add one more for 09. continue building on my faith in myself, my friends, and everything i stand for... regulars of this place will know religion and my lack of it is one topic i've always loved to touch on but usually just brush through cos it's way freaking hard to write bout it while still being sensitive and insightful. i don't think i am anywhere near that now anyway also (i might try a full entry on that one of these days but don't bank on it)
but yeah... to feel others in. i've always admired the power religions have been able to harness and bring about. it's absolutely phenomenal. but sadly, i don't really agree and subscribe to most of their views. so as a non-believer, i've always wondered and mused bout how we too can harness such incredible energy... it's nice to blindly believe in something. it's amazing how much strength people have been able to draw from religion, be it when they are down in their deepest trenches or just ordinary people going bout their everyday lives.
what i will do when everything around me falls apart is one question i ask myself occasionaly. when u find out that everything u have done has failed, and everything else has failed you, who will you turn to? i put myself in other people's shoes and i can see that religion can indeed be a powerful thing to hang on to for many people. having a great grandfather with a spiritual experience during WWII probably reinforced that for me
but no, i'm a deep non-believer. i'm starting to call myself a secular humanist rather than a free thinker even. it all started early in secondary school when i found that term. started out as a joke cos it sounded cool. tried it on one evangelist once. could see him all stumped when the last few times when i got approached by them i could so totally swear i saw their eyes light up when i say i'm a free thinker
ok. but read a bit more bout it recently (recently as in past few years)... it's a very disjointed group with a lot of differing views, and while there are some things i don't agree with i can totally identify myself with many parts and the main gist of it. basically, how i feel bout humanism is the belief in the human spirit: the ability and strength of us to overcome obstacles. of course, there's the evolution stuff too but belief is what i like to talk more about
and at the center of it all is belief in yourself. i'd like to think i've gone a long way since last time. can still quite vividly remember the teenage angst (i like to call it that haha) i went through from bout p5 to sec 2-3 approx... um. ok. i lazy to elaborate. when i look back i find myself way different from back then. it's like...
(ok i'm exhausted. this is supposed to link to some musing and reflections on ambition and drive. which was supposed to be the main point of today. but i'd leave this hanging on like this. hopefully will come back tml. but no guarantees. til then...)
