The simpler life...

just saw the photos they took last sat. how nice to send me. looks like they had fun... a real pity i couldn't make it. darn. my luck. would have been nice to catch up. i still meet up with some of them but it's the class thingy. oh well... i didn't leave a note for ms chan. but hope vinnie sent my regards. i'm just not one to put things down in words (and here i am blogging. the irony). some things, many things are better just left alone needing no explanation

something seemed to have struck me looking at the photos. i dunno what. but hmm... seems like i've been living a life that's not mine for the past half a year or year. i've blamed it on army, how there was no time after the exams before enlistment, how bmt sucked the life out of me. but i think in the end it was just silly ol' me, living in the little fantasy world in my head. only this time it's not just in my head. no turning back now. leopard can never change its spots. that's why i'm slowly going back into that comfort shell. it took until only today that i realised that it's not so much of mp giving back the life bmt took away from me. it's the novelty of the fictitious world that looked so magnificent, so green on the other side of the fence. sure, leopard can never change its spots, but it can sure develop a few more permanent scars
(okay, so scars wasn't the right word. the connotation of sth bad. but i can't think of anything else that's permenant and added on after time)

one day all of the lies aren't gonna cover no more. and tt day i'd pay for living the life that was never meant to be mine