Saturday, October 23, 2004
Insensitive Freak
Still brooding over grad even though i've told myself that it's over, but was a pleasant surprise when i found out that ash, candy and weiteng were at woodlands library studying. so i met with some 4e1 pple again, and i definitely treasured every second we spent there together. it still feels very weird thinking bout how we'd no longer have any lessons and how we'd only go back now for exams, but at least i'm spending more time with friends and that's always gd.
but feel so bad now. so guilty that i'm such an insensitive person... the day started out so well, with candy, ash and wei teng arguing over every li'l thing and being all so merry and cheerful. however, things went on, we talked and i failed to notice it's sensitive ground we were at. so there we were, making our jokes and speculation that we failed to take into consideration other pple's feelings. feel so sad that candy ended up so moody cos of what we said. we tried to cheer her up after that, but failed... why is it that i'm always such a heartless person... i'm gonna hate myself for that. hope she'd feel better now.
eventually, it was time to say goodbye... i really didn't want to say that, didn't want to leave. i want to spend that second more with my friends, and another second and another. sigh... so off we went on our separate ways. it's so ironic that we are yearning so much to spend time together now but it's exactly because we meet up that we have to endure that painful goodbye. I'm feeling much better now, but i can't deny that i'm not exactly over graduation. i try to distract myself by playing some computer games but i juz can't concentrate. i lose even in simple puzzle games, i crash my cars so often, i get thrashed by the ai... i slept a lot yesterday cos i juz can't do anything, and i dun see that improving much. i'm scared that my results might suffer big time as a result but i can't bring myself to study when i'm still seriously pondering over things...
someone pls grant us more opportunities to be together. again, it's so ironic that i wanted so much more study leave but it's because of the lack of it that we got more time together. even though it's over, i still want to meet up with friends every day. and after the o levels, i wanna spend every day with them. heck, i think i'm gonna call some of the closer friends out everyday until they think that i'm irritating... and someone pls bless me with time to spend with pple i dun know so well too. they're a part of my memories as well, one of my friends too but we dun know each other so well that we can juz ask them out for a chat or something like that. i still dun wanna part...
but feel so bad now. so guilty that i'm such an insensitive person... the day started out so well, with candy, ash and wei teng arguing over every li'l thing and being all so merry and cheerful. however, things went on, we talked and i failed to notice it's sensitive ground we were at. so there we were, making our jokes and speculation that we failed to take into consideration other pple's feelings. feel so sad that candy ended up so moody cos of what we said. we tried to cheer her up after that, but failed... why is it that i'm always such a heartless person... i'm gonna hate myself for that. hope she'd feel better now.
eventually, it was time to say goodbye... i really didn't want to say that, didn't want to leave. i want to spend that second more with my friends, and another second and another. sigh... so off we went on our separate ways. it's so ironic that we are yearning so much to spend time together now but it's exactly because we meet up that we have to endure that painful goodbye. I'm feeling much better now, but i can't deny that i'm not exactly over graduation. i try to distract myself by playing some computer games but i juz can't concentrate. i lose even in simple puzzle games, i crash my cars so often, i get thrashed by the ai... i slept a lot yesterday cos i juz can't do anything, and i dun see that improving much. i'm scared that my results might suffer big time as a result but i can't bring myself to study when i'm still seriously pondering over things...
someone pls grant us more opportunities to be together. again, it's so ironic that i wanted so much more study leave but it's because of the lack of it that we got more time together. even though it's over, i still want to meet up with friends every day. and after the o levels, i wanna spend every day with them. heck, i think i'm gonna call some of the closer friends out everyday until they think that i'm irritating... and someone pls bless me with time to spend with pple i dun know so well too. they're a part of my memories as well, one of my friends too but we dun know each other so well that we can juz ask them out for a chat or something like that. i still dun wanna part...
